The Ads

Please note these are not the actual titles of the commercials (probably).

Bud Light + Firebreathing: Not as funny as Bud Light has given us. Eh. I don't think Bud Light found a new "Magic Refrigerator" tonight.

Audi R8 + Godfather parody: Fantastic. And great product category branding.

Diet Pepsi Max + Night at the Roxbury parody / narcolepsy: Terrible.

Salesgenie.com + ACME Widgets animated: Huh?

Bud Light + beer hidden in other objects: Better than firebreathing. Still eh.

Under Armour: Um... anyone get slightly fascist/undertones from this? Reminded me of film versions of Nazi speeches and V For Vendetta's evil government. Was it just me?

Bridgestone Tires + screaming forest creatures: Mildly amusing. Don't think it sells me a tire so much as a car, though.

Doritos + Kina Grannis music: Um... where are the DORITOS? And what does this have to do with DORITOS?

Wanted promo: Nice visual effects (seems to be "a new twist on bullet-time"). Heavily featuring Angelina Jolie and having most of the dialogue come from Morgan Freeman were probably the right calls.

Gatorade G2 + Derek Jeter and Peyton Manning: I chuckled at tad at the end.

GoDaddy.com + promo for online ad: I know that Fox shot down the ads they wanted to run... but that just didn't do anything for me. I guess it would serve the purpose of driving people to the website.

Dell + Product (Red): Ad gave me awkward ass-slap/molestation vibes that didn't wind up being funny at the end.

FedEx + Carrier Pigeons: Funny stuff. I approve this message.

Cars.com + Circle Death Match: Goddammit I hate ads from websites that not-so-subtly tell you specifically what they do. I just find it creatively lacking.

Tide To Go + Talking Stain: More annoying than anything else.

Budweiser + Rocky parody with Clydesdale and Dalmation: YES. Not sure if they is the best ad so far. I think I might still have to give that to the Audi R8. But great ad. And the animals didn't talk!

Iron Man promo: Went by too quickly, but it was engaging/explosive enough to warrant a rewind (in fact, it was rewound at the party I attending).

Corolla + Ferocious Badgers: So when you're in the car, you can't hear outside noises... okay... and?

Leatherheads promo: Definitely had a "ye ol' chucklefest" feeling to it.

Garmin GPS + Napoleon: Huh?

CareerBuilder.com + Follow Your Heart: Gross...

SoBe Life Water + "Thriller" Dancing Lizards: Don't really understand the ad, but it was amusing (because no one but lizards dosed with some drink would want to dance with Naomi Campbell).

Parents, The Anti-Drug: The ad was basically like "Teens, you can get high off things in your parents' medicine cabinets." Thanks, Office of National Drug Control Policy / Partnership for a Drug-Free America!

GMC Yukon Hybrid + Sisyphus crudely-drawn animation: Okay, I get it, but it was a tad cerebral (not to mention not flashy) for a Super Bowl ad.

Bud Light + Carlos Mencia: Carlos Mencia is not funny. Nor was this commercial.

Prince Caspian promo: God (er, maybe not the right thing to call on) help me, I'm actually going to see this movie (really, really, really disliked the first movie, though I loved the books as a kid).

Planters + Unibrow Lady: Mean-spirited (though definitely got the "men love nuts" message across). Is this only a year after the Dove "Real Women" ads?

T-Mobile + Charles Barkley: Cloying.

Pepsi + Justin Timberlake: Would be even funnier if I hadn't seen it on YouTube (several times) but it still makes me laugh so whatevs. Especially enjoy the mailbox yelping and the HDTV wanging the back of his head at the end. Hm, does this say something about some subconscious urge to do bodily harm to Mr. JT?

Doritos + Mouse Trap: Um... okay. Unexpected ending.

Lexus GS + Thing It Can Do But You Shouldn't: Not bad, but not great. Would work outside of the Super Bowl, but I'm not sure it's big enough for the event. Well... I guess Lexus may actually have been SMART by making an ad they can reuse outside of the game.

Toshiba HD DVD Player: Hahah, dying format (Travis loves his PS3/Blu-Ray player).

Jeep/Dodge/Chrysler + Animated Rhyme: Zzzz.

NFL Network: Well, it's the right crowd...

Lexus GS + The Doughnut: As above with the longer ad.

Zantac: Utterly forgettable (but not an affront to mankind).

Cars.com + Witch Doctor: Okay, so the Cars.com ads follow the formula of someone shopping for a car explaining that they did their research on cars.com, and thus they don't need to use "Plan B" on sleazy, unhelpful car salesmen. Bigger question: why is TJ Thyne (Bones' Jack Hodgins) stooping to commercial work? Oh, right... writers' strike... forgot about that...

Salesgenie.com + Pandas animated: Just not good. Just not good.

Vitamin Water + Shaq as a horse jockey: Um... no.

Bud Light + Cavemen: I guess I'm just one of those guys that don't find cavemen that much of a source of humor (certainly not the series). Why Bud persists on these ads... well, I guess someone out there likes 'em.

Ice Breakers Ice Cubes: I think they could've done a lot more with the "prepare for the stontaneous 'whoa'" message.

Bridgestone Tires + Richard Simmons: Would've been much funnier (IMHO) if the driver, after choosing to avoid a deer and what appeared to be a whacked-out, goth serial killer hitchhiker, had run Richard Simmons over. But, again, I'm used to these commercials about how cars handle on roads being about... well, cars.

CareerBuilder.com + Wishing Won't Get You A Better Job: Oh, that's just not right. Icky spider eating Jiminy Cricket-a-like.

Hyundia Genesis: No ad will convince me that a Hyundai is the performance equivalent of a Mercedes. Trying to position your brand up the premium scale is hard. Sorry, Hyundai! Well, not that sorry.

Wall-E promo: Toy Story characters talking about Wall-E... maybe it would've been a bit better to do a promo about the movie instead of the character? I know it's Disney-Pixar's hardest sell yet (they keep outdoing themselves on that scale...) I mean, it was cute, but... eh. When does Toy Story 3-D come out?

Jumper promo: Nothing new here, moving on.

E-Trade + Talking Baby: We were so close to having a Super Bowl without a talking baby... So. Close.

Bud Light + Flying: As with firebreathing... Bud Light has been funnier with its concepts and with its ending twists.

NFL.com SuperAd: I'm not sure what, if anything, the ad about Chester Pitts was selling, but it was engaging.

Nissan Murano: So far ahead, the rest of the world will have to catch up? Eh.

Sunsilk + Marilyn/Shakira/Madonna: Seemed out of place during the Super Bowl.

Coca-Cola + Thanksgiving Day Parade Balloons: Right up there with Audi and the Budweiser Clydesdale ads for "best of the night".

Coca-Cola + James Carville / Bill Frist: You know, I didn't like the ad at first... I thought that politics should've stayed out of the Super Bowl commercials... but, obviously, the point was that despite differences, both extremes can enjoy Coca-Cola (and through Coke, friendship). Nice. Not as good as the above ad, though. What prime real estate Coca-Cola bought!

Toyota Sequoia: Yawn.

You Don't Mess With the Zohan promo: Adam Sandler in a Super Bowl commercial should be a gland slam. I dunno about this movie, though... especially with the far-less-one-joke Hancock coming out (though not being promoted here).

E-Trade Talking Baby 2: Argh. Anyone else notice that the baby DOESN'T BLINK!?

Tace Bell Fiesta Platters: Uh... okay. Barely passable. But passable. Taco Bell has always been about camp anyway.

Gatorade + Dog Lapping from Bowl: One of those "waste of space" ads. The "man's best friend" tagline totally didn't work for me.

Bud Light + Semi-Pro tie-in: I usually don't like Will Ferrell being Will Ferrell... but this (multiple takes where his character says an innuendo-laden wrong line) made me laugh (especially the "suck one" line).

Hyundai Genesis 2: Again, Hyundai, there is nothing you can do to position yourself in league with Lexus, Meredes BMW. You make cheap, crappy cars.

Victoria's Secret: Pitch. Perfect. And tasteful.

Amp Energy Drink: Just wrong. Just so very wrong.

As for Fox's promo department...

Sarah Connor Chronicles had the biggest push. I loved the CG terminator fighting the Fox football robot thing... SCC and Prison Break were set to gain the most as far as Fox shows go, because of their young-and-male-skewing demo scores. I found the PB promo where the characters find a tunnel that opens in the middle of the big game to be trying too hard (okay, I've given up on the show and nothing is bringing me back, so I'm biased).

House's post-game episode obviously got a push... not quite as "must watch" as ABC's "Code Black" promos for Grey's Anatomy (OMG, a compliment for the ABC promo department?) Probably because the episode wasn't really originally written as a post-game event episode (cue reader: ENOUGH ALREADY, TRAVIS). The promo with dubbed voices over various football coaches "talking about House" amused me. But, to be honest... I'm (pleasantly?) surprised Fox didn't promote it more. They spent a lot more on time on SCC (which needs the boost after a two weeks of steeply declining ratings after it's smashing premiere, and a week off for a repeat and the State of the Union address).

Unhitched (previously known as The Rules for Starting Over) didn't hold me interest, mostly because the pilot I saw 9 months ago was among the vilest things ever (primate rape is funny? huh?) I'd seen the New Amsterdam promo before, unless it's changed, it goes in the "wouldn't air except for the strike" category, and I don't think the ad was particularly compelling (how many "New York's Most Brilliant Detective"s are there, anyway?)

American Idol had a really good promo at the end with Ben Roethlisberger, but I was confused by the earlier promos because there is still a week of auditions, yet they were promo-ing Hollywood Week. WTF?