Revenant

This episode of Legend of the Seeker would've been much better if I hadn't already seen it / something conceptually like it done MUCH better in Buffy season two ("I Only Have Eyes For You").

Finally some good news from Grey's

They're keeping Jessica Capshaw around!  Which means (a) potential for an appropriately structured Callie/Arizona relationship (versus "I have my lesbian glasses on and I can see the leaves"), and (b) Bailey should be officially specializing in peds, the Chief be damned.  Woot.

Larry King vs Tracy Does Conan

Two episodes with a plot about Tracy's guest appearance on a talk show.

Hm.

Dual Tuner

Hm, Idol seems to have extended into the 9pm hour, and DVR didn't record The Office if it was new.

Oddly, I'm not too sure I care...?  The season post-Holly (and much of last season) have been underwhelming to the point of tedium and apathy.

6 of 12

Yay!  OMG I'm so shocked that America didn't put Nick through but GO AMERICA!  YES, WE CAN HAS!  And, yay, my non-Nick #3 made it through, too!  I'm actually 6 for 12!  Woot!

Meanwhile, I'm stepping away from my ZOMG over Adam Lambert.  Girlfriend needs to step away from the overdone, Christina Aquilera-esque runs during his performances (as impressed as we are that he's got those pipes) and SING A F***ING MELODY.  And stop mugging for the camera.  During the group sing... oh, man, it was just Mug City.  And the "Yayz, Iz in teh Top 12, lulz" repeat of "Satisfaction"... come on, man!  Love that they made him sweat it out against Nick, who I think we can agree, people seriously thought was gonna squeak through as a spoiler.  Really looking forward to him singing something Bowie or Aerosmith

How awkward for Alexis, Danny, and Michael to sit through the whole show on those bar stools...

Of this group, I am hoping Megan and Jessie get a wildcard shot.  Maybe Matt Giraud.  Maybe Mishavonna.  Interesting... the "hot girl with mediocre (by finalist standards) voice" category is NOT getting through in the new format.

Kris' reaction to getting in won me over (but calling this group of semifinalists the best group... I question your taste, sir!)  And, like Michael Sarver last week, his moving-on-up performance is superior to the vote-for-me performance (he fixed the beginning pitch issues, IMHO).

Hey!  It's a retrospective of Idol-crowning moments... and here's Brooke White! (or should that be "and here's Brooke White...?")  Yay, she didn't start over ;)  I always felt Brooke was last season's "should be playing small venues of her own singer-songwriter music, but her range is way too narrow for this show" contestant.  This song is very smooth, and I love that she connects with it emotionally (hint, hint, this season's contestants... don't just sing technically, sing emotionally).

Next week... Lil Rounds owns the stage, Ryan makes us all feel awkward when he talks to Scott MacIntyre, and we all get so over Nathaniel "DRAMZ QUEEN" Marshall.

The Life and Death of Jeremy Bentham

WHERE ARE WE?  WHEN ARE WE?  WHO IS THIS MAN?  DAMN YOU, LOST!  Oh, hey, that's totally the guy who was on Ajira 316.  Files on space-time...?  OMG and he knows Sayid's US Marshall Woman.

Glad there's actually plane wreckage... now how did Jack, Kate, and Hurley get separated from it?

And Locke is alive / resurrected / whatevered now that they're BAAAAAAAACK on the Island.  Not a surprise.  But welcome.

ABC just broke its own rule about the length of acts by having, including the "Previously on" section be under 4m30s.  They have this rule because the longest commercial pod they'll air is 4m30s, and they never want any section or the show to be shorter than a commercial pod.  But, hey, this is Lost.  "The rules" don't apply (and it's a silly rule, anyway... it's always bothered me that you can't do a 1 or 2 page teaser on an ABC show and cut to commercial when it feels right for the story).

So turning the frozen donkey wheel sends you to Tunisia all the time?  Does Locke no longer have use of his legs (even if the bone is sticking out of one) because he's off-Island?

I want to say "OMG, the terrorists have Locke" but that would be a terribly inappropriate thing to say, right?

Okay, so the format is now on-Island opening with Ajira 316 people, then flashback for the 'splainy?  It's kinda like the first season!  Only with more answers instead of character pieces!  And space-time file charts!

MATTHEW ABADDON!

CHARLES WIDMORE!  WAS A LEADER OF THE OTHERS!  AND TURNED THE DONKEY WHEEL!

LOCKE ASKED CHARLES WIDMORE THE QUESTION "WHY?" AND CHARLES KIND OF SORT OF ACTUALLY GAVE AN ANSWER.  MORE IMPORTANTLY, A CHARACTER ON THIS SHOW ASKED THE QUESTION "WHY?"!!!!

Did anyone else know this episode was 66 minutes long?

It's 1:40am, I'm shutting up (even though I'm certain there's going to be so much SQUEE) so Ican watch tonight and then get some sleep.

2nd 12 of 36

Seacrest is wearing a short-sleeved polo shirt.  I don't understand.  When did this become casual Tuesd--- Wednesday on the main stage?

Um, yes this group has an advantage.  Merely competent or safe ≠ moving onto next round.  Especially if you didn't have screen time before.  I mean, then you kind of just have to be like "I know I'm boned, so I'm going to make the most of this one shot and hope the judges pick me to be in the wild card round.

This week's theme is the Billboard Hot 100.  Did last week have a theme?  Better the semifinals have a theme like this than last season's 60s/70s/80s, since last year every comment was like "not current, dawg."

Jasmine Murray - I kinda expected her to bust out a Beyonce ballad (Randy says Rihanna, but let's be honest, Beyonce's songs are more range-y)?  But don't think Sara Bareilles' "Love Song" is big enough to show off her voice.  But she shows me generally wrong, going on some fun runs and using the stage.  Go, Jasmine!  But, honey, lose the coat.  Hopefully her screentime will get her through because I like this girl.  The young kids, thus far, have not had great song choice.

Matt Giraud - Why is boy not playing the piano on this?  I bet he's got a bang-up, slowed-down, piano-accompanied version of "Viva La Vida" somewhere in him.  He's way too breathy for me.  But I actually understand the lyrics coming out of his mouth, which is something I often don't do with Chris Martin.  Glad he didn't do Justin Timberlake because too obvious... but that probably would've worked better for him.

Wow, two favorites felled by poor song choice.  Apparently the second group of semifinalists did not learn from last week.  Or the first seven seasons of the show.

Jeanine Vailes - One of my "Who dat?" people.  "This Love"?  Really?  This is such a staccato song, but just because a song is your favorite doesn't mean it's appropriate for you.  If you want to sing this kind of song, yeah, sing Rihanna.  Not Maroon 5.  But you know what?  And she's got some great legs.  Yes, Paula.

OMG THIS IS THE EPISODE OF BROKEN DREAMS

Nick Mitchell - OMG.  He's performing as Normal Gentle.  I can't handle it.  I just can't.  He is staying.  He's totally through to the next round.  Sanjaya.  SANJAYA!  Well, Tatas didn't get through... a girl can dream.  You know what, this is the judges' faults.  Can this please be the time the producers step in and keep him off (actually I guess if the producers intervene they'd keep him on... buzz buzz buzz).  Nick/Normal/whatever is like the genre-savvy kid who calls everyone on the Starship Enterprise on the sci-fi bullshit.

Allison Iraheta - I love this girl's red hair.  I think it has it's own personality.  Please let her not hall prey to the poor song choices of the other young kids.  OMG.  Heart's "Alone."  YES!  YES!  Even if this song is owned on Idol by Carrie Underwood.  Still, we know the heights the song can soar to.  The first performance of the night as far as I'm concerned.  I'm worried the judges will say it's too old for her?  I'm so glad they didn't.

Kris Allen - Attempting a Michael Jackson song.  Can we get a David Cooke-"Billie Jean" style brillz perf?  Or is this going to be Steven Fowler?  And does anyone know who this kid is (besides being attractive)?  He had one great moment in the middle of song and after that it got better.  I don't think the beginning was as rough as Kara implied.  Simon's comment = wildcard round (I believe the wildcard round is judges picking 9 contestants... not necessarily from the Top 36, and giving them another performance... not sure if the viewers or the judges ultimately decide which three move on from there... give Ricky Braddy from last week another shot, judges!)

Megan Corkrey - She auditioned with and is performing the same genre of song.  OMG, shockingly appropriate choice!  But it's a boring song (and not very range-y)... as catchy as it is.  And I don't think she does as well with it as she should have (not that it was bad, per se).  Megan has no stage presence and NO idea what to do up there behind the microphone.  Paula's right on the Nelly Furtado... similar facial structure.

Matt Breitzke - Tonic's "If You Could Only See."  Well, I love the song itself.  Matt actually sounds kind of similar to Emerson Hart?  This isn't a big, showy song, though.  Matt's got a better voice than this performance.  He's got great pitch, but I didn't get any "wow" here.  Pretty bland.

WHY DO ALL OF THESE SEMIFINALISTS SUCK AT PICKING SONGS FOR THEMSELVES

Jessie Langseth - Her video segment was entertaining.  She's spunky.  I don't have any idea what this song is, which upon investigation on Google, I ought to (even if it predates me).  Honestly, between Jessie and Megan for Little Miss Raspy Voice... I think Megan wins.  Jessie talks back waaaaaay too much (and too much "mm hmm" when she isn't talking).  And she needs Nicole Kidman Forehead Reduction Surgery (yes, yes, I'm a bitch... it's almost 1am and I have three more performances and Lost to get through, then sleep and work in the morning).  Simon saying she has a good voice, and her sucking up to Randy with the Q&A session could give her a chance to follow through on his advice.

Kai Kalama - "What Becomes of the Broken Hearted."  I don't know why I'm saying this now, but none of the contestants this season have attempted reinterpretations (or less-traditional covers) of these songs.  It's karaoke town.  Back to Kai... he's got a totally competent voice.  But, just like Jessie... that song had, maybe, 7 notes he needed to hit.  But, Simon... why would anyone play this song at a wedding?  Maybe a bitter divorcée's settlement party?

Mishavonna Henson - "Drops of Jupiter" by Train.  I can't remember what this girl sang before, but I do know this song has more range than Maroon 5's "This Love" so I'm hoping for better than Jeanine.  Something is up with Mishavonna's facial expressions?  I loved the soft note she injected into a number of the verse lines.  This isn't a blow-me-away, wow-factor, but considering the crapfest tonight has largely been, it's nuanced and entertaining, well... it's still a weird choice.  I don't think this performance was nearly as tragic as the judges have made it seem.  The advice to let loose and have fun is spot on, though.

Adam Lambert (PIMP SPOT!) - I'm so happy Adam has the pimp spot.  As I've said before, he's either going to be glorious or I'm going to extremely sad because he's gone all musical theater over-the-top.  His hair has grown out a lot and even though it's flat-ironed, he looks like he has Hobbit hair in the video segment (I think it's mostly that tuft over his right ear from a full-frontal angle... it's far better once he comes on stage so yay).  "Satisfaction" by the Rolling Stones.  So, um, did he just make love to the camera?  I think he did.  He's certainly having fun with it.  Goddamn it, I hate tenors and their ability to hit all those high notes.  GOOD LORD, that wasn't even falsetto.  There's a lot of runs.  Perhaps too much?  But I don't think it pushed it into the over-the-top place.  And I disagree with the overly emoed out all-black clothing and ONE FINGERLESS LEATHER GLOVE (and Randy not-quite-namechecks-but-refers-to Pete Wentz, Edward Cullen, and Gerard Way... yeah).  Well, I guess that answers the question of whether there's going to be a standout performance in this round... go, Adam!

Top Female: Allison Iraheta

Top Male: Adam Lambert

Next best... well, we all know Nick Mitchell is getting through... but this is a tough one otherwise.  I'd have gone with Kris Allen and either Megan Corkrey or Mishavonna Henson (who I didn't hate like the judges seemed to even though their comments weren't really about singing ability or even singing the song, but it being the wrong song and her not showing the right personality).  Kris would be my first choice of those in the case of Nick not making it through.

Thus far the show has really utilized the pimp spot to feature the best of the bunch... and they've both been guys.  Can we switch it up next week and get a girl in the pimp spot?  Lil Rounds?

Rhys Coiro

No one does crazy like my hometown boy, Rhys.  Thank god his character was (one of) the mole(s) on 24 because except the moments Janeane Garofalo has had Keyboard of Death hackmatches against Chloe, she's been shockingly boring.

Also, he recovers quickly from a self-inflicted gunshot wound.

Why does no one ever think there are multiple moles in TV government agencies?  I mean... the Bristows, Jack and Sydney...

But, please, Rhys.  Don't go back to Entourage.

Meanwhile, it would seem Renee Walker has never been in a situation with collateral damage before... seriously?  And now she's slapping Jack and crying onto his shoulder?

I should know better than to pay attention to Fox's promos for this show by now, y'know?  "The episode that changes everything"?  More like "the episode that happens two or three times a season where the plot changes directions as a villain/terrorist threat is replaced by a different villain/terrorist threat who was backing the early Little Bad."

I hope Bill Buchanan is the Big Bad of this season and it was all done to get CTU reinstated and Jack Bauer off the hook.  Okay, I don't hope that, but I'd be intrigued.

Oh, hey, Tony is still on this show!  And they Middle Bad is targeting the White House.  Because they already built those sets.

Oh, Kurtwood Smith.  How did you manage to be in both 24 and Worst Week?  I am impressed.

Oscars

I gotta admit, I just can't get it up for this year's Oscars.  I'm not even bothering with "predictions" (most categories are already locks anyway).  Blah.

LotS

WTF?  Is this episode a clips show?  The series has barely had half a season...

Hahah, okay, there was some "original" material, but plenty of clips throughout.  A little early to be doing an alternaverse episode, no?

Glee

I don't really know what to think about Glee (the pilot anyway).

It's High School Musical but a TV series instead of a TV movie (Finn, one of the main characters, the QB on the football team, is coerced into joining the glee club and SHOCK has to deal with pressure from his teammates about singing), and it expands into the adult world much more significantly than HSM (it's about a 60/40 mix, I'd say, the 60 on the adult side).  It's uplifting, heart-soaring, farcically campy and silly, at times touching, and just generally entertaining.  But I can see it not being to everyone's taste (the musical numbers at times reminded me of Idol's group sings...)

Actually I guess it's more like the bastard lovechild of HSM and Bring It On.

On the casting side... it's got (the original Broadway version of) Hairspray's Matthew Morrison and Spring Awakening's Lea Michele (yay!) meaning the teen female lead CAN ACTUALLY SING AND DANCE.

And Jane Lynch (who is not really utilized much in the pilot but the brief moments she's there... hilarity ensues), who by herself would be able to make me watch paint dry while she read the telephone book (do they still make those?)

The pilot is also about 12 minutes longer than can be fit into an hour of TV, so unless FOX works out a deal with the affiliates to bleed into the 10pm hour or does some significant cutting... it won't air as I saw it.  Which is a shame for all of the above reasons.

It might also be the most expensive television show of all time when it goes past the pilot.  Musical numbers take extra time to shoot right because of voice/lip synching.  Plus all the dancing.  Plus all of the music licensing (I mean, there's a LOT of music).

Which adds up to the sad reality that subsequent episodes won't have nearly the amount of magic the pilot has.

But, hey.  I have to say I am so very on board (much more so than for the script of ABC's Fame-esque pilot Limelight).

I'm not sure why this show hasn't been scheduled yet.  I can't believe Fox would take something this potentially amazing and relegate it to the summer (maybe it'll premiere after the Final Two Perform episode of Idol on May 20th?)  Sigh.

ABDC3's Battle of the Sexes

Hm.  Not sure how I feel about America's Best Dance Crew having a Chris Brown song for one of its performances (not only too soon... but, like, I really don't know if I'm going to EVER be able to listen to that guy's music again...)

Not only that, but Fly Khicks are performing a Rihanna song... oy!

I called 2 of the final 3 way back when... Strikers All-Stars screwed up tonight (but I have to say Fly Khicks have grown on me throughout the last few weeks so I'm alright with this turn of events).

Whatever, no one freaking touches Beat Freaks.

316

WHO PUT THE PILOT OF LOST ON AFTER THE PREVIOUSLY ON INSTEAD OF THE NEXT EPISODE OF SEASON FIVE.

Lol.

Seriously, though, Jack waking up in the bamboo jungle like in the pilot is what I, for a long time, expected would be the series' final image because of all of The Dark Tower references.

But this is the show that spits in the face of expectations, like, twice a scene lately, so... yay.

And, like, 45 seconds in, I'm more confused/excited/ZOMGed than ever.  I LOVE THIS M*****F***ING SHOW.  Who could've anticipated a flash forward to the Oceanic 6's return to The Island in the SIXTH EPISODE?  Not I.  But, y'know, we all knew they were gonna get back to The Island at some point (after all they had TO GO BAAAAAAAAACK) so I like that the writers are setting up more blanks to be filled in between, but giving us a sense of where things are headed (foreboding, woo).

Fionnula Flanagan rocks.  And a 'splainy for why the place she was in at the end of "The Lie" looked so much like a Dharma station!

"Is he telling the truth?" "Probably not." LULZ.

I feel like I'm in 2nd grade and my teacher is explaining long division... only much more complicated.  Or having "how to beat that last ship in Space Invaders" explained to me.

Oh, Desmond.  Don't you know how TV works?  You say "no" at the start of the episode and by the, for some reason, you're going to be saying "yes."  But I don't expect you to be on the plane.  After all, you weren't on 815 (and neither was Ben...)

AJIRA AIRWAYS!

OMG this is possibly the longest scene in Lost history, almost entirely expository... AND I AM RIVETED.

So, because of the back-on-The-Island flash forward (or I guess this makes the off-Island events a flash back?) we know Jack, Hurley, and Kate were on the flight.  3 of 6, 3 of 6, not bad.  Aaron?  Sun?  Sayid?  Locke?  Ben?  WAAAAAAAAALT!!!!!!!?

OMG, LOCKE IS PLAYING THE ROLE OF JACK'S FATHER IN A COFFIN ON THE FLIGHT.  Recreating the 815 crash as best as they can... heart the idea.

So Jack = Thomas the Apostle and Locke = Jesus.  Too religious for my taste for this show (that's not involving Eko).  Locke was a man of faith... but never religious faith.  Faith in The Island.  Faith in Fate.  Dammit we still need to find out WTF happened to Locke and what he said to all these peeps after turning the donkey wheel in the Way Way Back When last episode (timestream = confuddled after last week... other timeflashes all had pretty specific events and years attached to them).

Dear lord, do not let Ben go off and kill Penny.  I will cry.

Once again, I suspect that SOMEONE is going to be asking Kate WTF happened to Turniphead.  Because I demand to know.

Sidenote - the "I don't need you to be a doctor, I need you to be a god" part of the Grey's Anatomy/Private Practice was the worst part of those promos and now the promo is, in big letters "Doctor... of GOD?"  Oh, ABC.  Oh, Shonda.  Oh, vomit.

But back to Lost.

Oh, Ben.  Oh, Ben.  I will be so unhappy.  I will cry.  Oh, Ben.

Good thing rigor mortis hadn't set in on Locke's corpse.  Also, good thing those shoes fit?

Hm, are we going to have a whole slew of new characters aboard this plane to keep track of (or at least this guy who offered his condolences to Jack)?

Yay, Sun is on the plane!

YES.  YES!  SAYID IS BEING ESCORTED BY A US MARSHALL (who is this woman?)

Good call on buying up all the empty seats, Hurley.  Good call.  But how did he get out of prison...?

"The other people on this plane... what's going to happen to them?"  "Who cares?"  I love Ben.  But I hate him.  But I love him!  But no.  I must.  But I cannot.

FRANK LAPIDUS IS THE PILOT.  ARE YOU SERIOUS?  AND HE SHAVED.

"We're not going to Guam, are we?"  Nope.  Nope...

"How can you read?"  "My mother taught me."  ROFL.

Jack, that is NOT the proper way to open an envelope.

HOLY FORWARD MOMENTUM!

And the kicker is that the jumping through time is NOT done for our, um, did-not-leave-The-Island-ers and our Ajira 316ers have joined them (at least temporarily... at the very least they're back in the 70s and Jin is driving Roger Workman's VW Bus).

HOLY EFF.

3 of 12

Can I call it OR CAN I CALL IT, BITCHES!?

I think we'll be seeing more of Anoop, though.

Out of everyone, I think the poorest hand of this new elimination / advancement format was dealt to Ricky Braddy, who got no screentime prior to the performance and did well (not amazing, but very well), but went early.  And, yeah, no screentime.  Does not bode well for people in the next two sets of 12 who weren't featured.  They're really going to have to blow people out of the water to survive.

Based solely on what I remember about next week's performers and assuming no one screws the pooch, my expectations are Adam Lambert, Jasmine Murray, and... sigh... Normal Gentle (if Nick Mitchell performances as Gentle, I think he's a lock...)

Please Note

I will be away from my computer for a good portion of today, so if final nationals that were delayed because of Presidents' Day do come, they will be posted when I get back later this afternoon.

12 of 36

Now this is a change of format.  I wonder how the show put each set of 12 semifinalists together... note how not all of the ringers are in a single group.  Only 3 being put through in each set (highest vote getting male and female, plus next highest vote getter), plus the judges' 3 wildcards (um, but there are 4 judges...? maybe it's one per group of 12?)

Yay!  I love this part of Idol... we actually get to HEAR THESE PEOPLE SING.

Yay!  Simon vs Ryan!

Jackie Tohn - Loved this girl in auditions.  Great personality, amazing rock-chick vocal edge.  HATE her outfit.  The backing music is way too low key.  On the other hand, it's all about her voice (and those pants...)  I suspect if she doesn't make it through, she could get a wildcard berth because her voice is so wildly different from everyone else's.  I'm with Simon on the trousers (and the song choice).

Ricky Braddy - Who?  Oh, and he's singing one of the songs I'm incredibly sick of (thank you, Cupid pilot fifth act).  Ricky starts out very lounge-y (IMHO), but I actually liked him breaking into falsetto, and I have to say he won me over.  Very smooth.

Alexis Grace - Rut roh, singing Aretha.  Love the hair.  Love the lipstick (maybe a shade too red?)  But, um, wow?  I officially hate this "send three through" thing (provided everyone is as good as the first three have averaged out to).  When it was 12 guys sing, send two home, 12 girls sing, send two home... you could count on a couple screwing up and cracking under pressure or choosing wrong songs.  Oh, good, I won the battle with the plastic bag wrapped around my Pad Kra Pao.  OMG NPH and Ted Danson in da house!  When Ryan said "and your girlfriend..." I thought Alexis was a lesbian, but then, no, it's her dad's girlfriend.  I feel bad that she's in the first half-hour because it's the least watched.

Brent Keith - Hot guy alert!  But can he sing?  WOW.  Live on-air VIDEO PLAYBACK ISSUES!  Blanchester is totally a portmanteu of something and Manchester, right?  Eh, I'm not a country music kinda guy, so it might be that, but I don't see Brent going through.  Poor, forgettable choice (once again, I agree with Simon).

Stevie Wright - Who?  She's singing Taylor Swift... who is of course known for her vocal prowess?  Oh, Stevie.  Leggings are not pants.  Don't you read GoFugYourself?  Hard to do anything with that song because there's no opportunity to go on riffs.  It's all rapid-fire lyric.  Girl's having fun, but not a lot of stage presence.  And some FLAT notes.  So, bad song choice... because of responding to judges' critiques (at least partly due to that).  HAH!  Simon says "but they listen to me" in response to Paula's "America votes" when he said Stevie won't be through to the next round (um, d'uh).

Anoop Desai - I love it when guys sing songs from female artists.  This is such a great song.  I miss the 90s.  There's a lot of backup singing... isn't there?  I wish he wouldn't hold those notes out all the time.  Give us a run!

Casey Carlson - BUBBLE TEA!  That's all I can think about.  This girl looks like a mix between Mandy Moore and Annie from 90210.  Not sure if that's a good (Mandy) or a bad (Annie) thing... I don't get the song choice for her.  Thank you, Kara, for complimenting Casey while tearing her down and ACTUALLY ADVISING HER.  You don't touch The Police, dammit.  Poor girl is going to cry onstage.  The air is completely sucked out of the room.  Why didn't this girl sing, like, "Everytime" by Britney?

Michael Sarver - Woo!  Heart this guy.  Oh, splech, he's singing the theme song from One Tree Hill.  Okay, aside from that factoid, I do like this song (separate from OTH, which as we all know, I think is landfill).  This song was waaaaay more uptempo than what I expected Michael to sing (given the songs he's performed).  Dude's got chops, though.  Put him through, America!

Ann Marie Boskovich - Oh, THAT'S who she is.  Yeah, I totally forgot her from the auditions.  Girl's got, like, a hot Celine Dion thing going on?  Love the dress.  Not as good as Alexis' take on Aretha, but I didn't think she was as bad as most of the judges made her out to be.  Certainly the second best female tonight thus far...

Steven Fowler - I want him to move from the one spot he's shaking around in.  After the judges critiqued Michael Sarver on switching the microphone between hands... Steven did it a couple of times.  He may have remembered the lyrics, but I think he was flat for a lot of the time and the song was, as Simon so often puts it, utterly forgettable.

Tatiana del Toro - This girl was so annoying (and teh dramz... TEH DRAMZ!) throughout auditions and Hollywood Week, is there any chance people will actually vote for her?  Singing Whitney Houston... you better work it, girl.  Um, what?  From the first note, the annoying girl is gone.  Can someone just not let her talk to people?  No interviews?  No video pods?  She's got a pretty damn good voice (though some of those low notes were too deep for her) and it wasn't consistent.

Danny Gokey (PIMP SPOT) - I kinda like his interview hair.  OMG he's SINGING MARIAH.  Screw Anoop's Monica song.  This is balls, man.  BALLS.  And everything we've seen of Danny says he wouldn't sing it unless he can own it because I don't think Idol had a technical singer like him (certainly not a male one) since Melinda Doolittle.  HOLY SHIZ KEY CHANGE.  Damn, boy, you deserved that m*****f***ing pimp spot.

If the gods are just...

Top Female: Alexis Grace.

Top Male: Danny Gokey (anyone else think this guy is Robert Downey, Jr in a slightly-overweight suit?)

Next best... Michael Sarver and Tatiana del Toro (I AM SHOCKÉD).

Middle of the road options who, if this semi-finals section weren't like this, would get another shot: Jackie Tohn (for the fun of it), Ricky Braddy (he was good, but early, and not great), Anoop Desai (because according to the judges he's likable), Ann Marie Baskovich.

So, basically, I'd chop 4 of these people off instead of the 9 that will be cut, and give the other 8 another chance to earn their way forward.  Life's hard, bitches.

200 pounds of cheese

That cheese challenge might just be the most amusing thing since Charla was in a knight's costume walking horses in The Amazing Race All-Stars.

I like that The Amazing Race and American Idol are both featuring deaf contestants.

I missed the first 18 minutes of the show (including commercials, so really just the introductions and the first airport segment since teams were already divided in Switzerland).  Thank you, Time Warner Cable.

Also missed: The Simpsons' first HD broadcast with new opening (I'll catch it on hulu, but... sigh).  WTF, TWC?  Seriously, you recorded United States of Tara at 7pm.  You weren't off.  You weren't recording anything else.  You just decided to not record the two programs at 8pm I have series passes for (TAR is set to record next week... so, yeah, I don't get it).

Not.  Cool.

UGH!  And Family Guy, which has been in repeats for, like, years, wasn't going to record!  I caught it in the middle of the opening theme.  Jeez, this is disturbing...

Meanwhile, Desperate Housewives was recording as expected.

SNL: Alec Baldwin / Jonas Brothers

Pretty solid episode, actually.  Most of the sketches (except the interminable opening sketch) even had endings.  The digital short was amusing.  Even Keenan got some laughs from me for the Sir Mix-a-Lot's Photo Shop.  And you know I never get tired of Cougar Den or Vincent Price specials.

They really name dropped 30 Rock up the wazoo...

Wish I Hadn't Watched Caprica Before Watching the Rest of BSG

Just saying.  Should've known better.  Not that there were spoilers (er, thus far) in Caprica.  But with the information revealed on tonight's BSG, my impression of Caprica would've been different (certainly my assumptions and impressions would have been).

Anyway, tonight's BSG was super fun and expository and all of a sudden the numbers assigned the various Cylon models make sense (why was there a Number 8 if there were only 7 numbered models?)

Interesting that the colonies were able to develop FTL drives, but the Kobol tribe that went to Earth were able to develop resurrection and NOT faster-than-light travel...

Cavil is an annoying, whiny bitch.

I will get around to writing a Caprica review one of these days (as well as writing pilot script reviews).

End transmission.

Grrr Argh

Even if Dollhouse was disappointing (though, actually, with all the "it's going to suuuuuuuuck" buzz it was more engaging than expected... still... not awful to the point of turning it off halfway through but not great... I think the appropriate word is "intriguing" with all the positive and negative connotations that word implies) it's nice to see the Mutant Enemy company card on my television again.

Grrr argh, indeed.

The Return of Izzie Stevens

So, yadda yadda yadda Grey's Anatomy/Private Practice crossover.  Y'know what I liked the most about the GA episode?  The Izzie Stevens story.  I know, shut up.  But that was a return to why we fell in love with Izzie in the first place.  She's cheerful and amusing and does glittery art projects that have a point.  Why did that character go away for the first half of this season to have sex with Ghost Denny?  Stupid, stupid, stupid.  But, of course, that story is continuing because we get bookend reminders from Karev that Izzie is not fine even though she insists she is.

Are we shocked that the "Doomsday Sucker" surgery that the patient begged Derek to perform that night went wrong (considering the Archer Montgomery surgery, essentially, went miraculously)?  Yes, because it didn't go wrong.  Why didn't it go wrong?  Hello?  Old Grey's Anatomy totally wouldn't have let that surgery go so smoothly.  Oh, wait!  It did!  Yay!

Smokezilla's Back!

How much have we missed the monster?  How much?  Especially after Ben sicked it on the militant Freighter people to, like, no avail.

Smokey!!!!

And how much do we want it to kill blond French dude who said Nadine, as a woman, probably ran off from the group chasing a butterfly she saw?

But slowly.  Let us savor the kill.  Yes.  Good, Smokey.

DUDE!  DUDE!  DUDE!

Suck it, Lacombe (?)

This is why Jin is awesome.  He can barely speak English (though it's totally gotten better!) but he doesn't need a physicist to tell him he's traveling through time.

Oh, shiz, we're when the Others came to take Alex from Danielle.  Shiz.  And the sickness is apparently the monster and not some actual contagion like what's making Charlotte and Miles and Juliet's noses bleed.  How did Robert know the monster was a security system guarding the temple (oh, and it specifically guards the temple?)

This episode is too good to keep going "oh, shiz!" to.  Must pay attention.  Night, interwebz.

Top 36

Kinda really enjoyed the "sing for your life!" twist in tonight's Idol.  Kept me on my toes (though seriously, Seacrest didn't need to point out the "irony" of almost every single sing-off pairing... are we really so stupid we can't understand irony when it's in front of us without it slapping us in the face for comi-tragic effect).  Especially that last sing-off... I was like "really?" when we were made to think one of them was going home.

Wondering whether Tatiana or Nick "Normal Gentle" Mitchell is going to be the more annoying contestant.

Praising the judges for letting ZOMFG DRAMZ QUEEN Nathaniel Marshall through.  He's going to be entertaining as long as he lasts (not seeing Top 12 here) and the costumes.  THE COSTUMES!

Loving that the show played Embrace's "Gravity" under a section of rejections.  God I love that band, they need more American exposure.

I think the show did a decent job filling viewers in on a lot of the Top 36 who weren't featured in the audition episodes / ones who were featured in auditions but not so much in the Hollywood rounds, but there are several who I'm still like... "who are they, again?" (Alex Wagner Trugman? Anne Marie Boskovich? Arianna Afsar? Jeanine Vailes? Junot Joyner? Kris Allen? Meghan Corkrey? Mishavonna Henson? Rick Braddy? Stevie Wright?)

My favorites right now are Lil Rounds and Danny Gokey, next tier would definitely be Jasmine Murray and probably Michael Sarver (hence my "you're going to make him sing-off?  Really?").  Looking forward to Adam Lambert's performances (either going to be really musical theater, really cool and current, or really terrible), and Jackie Tohn rocking out.

Christine Baranski

Well, that was a highlight episode of Big Bang Theory last night!

Love that Sheldon and Leonard's mom are so compatible with their neuroses.  And hilarity!  Guest Emmy?

It Tingles

Oh, Friday Night Lights.  You bring a smile to my face.  What a great end to the Smash Williams story.  Skin-crawling happiness.  Where you at, indeed!

The end of the Zarek-Gaeta mutiny was fantastic.  I wasn't hugely into it last week, but on so many fronts I see why it needed to be told.  And I'm glad the line was drawn between Gaeta's moral convictions and Zarek's, um, insanity.  Although, what happened to Sam?  Did I pass out or did the Starbuck/Sam/Lawyer going to Cottle story not actually reach an end (which, y'know, I understand given the HOLY FRAK of the final two acts).

Crossover time

Lol, Mode magazine in Grey's Anatomy.  I didn't know this was an Ugly Betty crossover, too!

Y'know, I'm actually enjoying the Grey's part thoroughly (minus Derek = idiot re still not having proposed and Izzie trying to administer whatever test on herself post long-delayed realization something wrong with her... honestly the show could will Derek, Izzie, and George off in one fateful car accident and I'd be just dandy)... I'm gonna shut up and watch (unless I really have something ) say).  I don't expect the crossover to really begin until the last moments of Grey's anyway.

Hey, Kevin McKidd's a series regular now!

Introducing Peds to the show has helped immensely (not to mention giving Bailey a lot to play with).  Hard to not care when it's a little kid's life at stake.  And Jessica Capshaw is a hoot!

Serial Killers!

The Gravedigger is back on Bones!  So says episode info.  Yay!  So happy.  But I have much TV to watch first (because, well, no one at work watches Bones and I need to watch the watercooler stuff... what with tomorrow being the last day of work and all...)

THR Feed re pilot season

James Hibbard has a truly amusing take on the pilots that have been ordered by the major networks thus far here.

I've read many of these pilot scripts (or drafts of them) and, naturally, have my opinions.  As tomorrow is my last day of work for a little while, I should have plenty of time to, y'know, espouse said opinions.

Just a warning.

In reading (especially loglines) please remember that just because something is unique does not mean it is good.  Or that it will be unique/good for long.  Also, there have been some very entertaining cop-lawyer-doctor shows!  Just because they're part of a mold doesn't mean they're going to suck.

Now, off to writing Paging Doctor Detective McCoy, Esquire...

Chuck 3D / Heroes Vol. 4

Chuck - The most "meh" episode of the season as far as, well, comedy and drama goes, but the visual gimmick was fun... but count me happy to take those damn glasses off!  This was as good a "restatement of the show's premise in a fun, easy to get into way" as possible given the day-after-Super-Bowl airing.  Still... disappointed in the episode (compared to the rest of this season, which has been awesome).

Heroes - Shut up, I know.  I, too, was suckered in by promise of a reboot even though we all knew that Bryan Fuller doesn't have anything to do with the first five episodes of this arc.  Not that I expect his presence behind the scenes to make much of a difference.  Let's just say this entire episode was straight from Joseph Campbell's monomyth with countless characters denying their, er, heroic nature.  But I have to ask... if Nathan's plans are, in fact, insidious, WHY abduct Peter and put him in the same place with a bunch of other "extraordinaries"?  And, Peter, if you're on a plane that's crashing and you previously had the power of flight and just absorbed Mohinder's super-strength (he still had this?) shouldn't you fly out of the plane and stop it from crashing?  Just saying, Superman would totally do it.  Also, Peter, WHY ARE YOU SUCH AN IDIOT?  In short, boring.  The only real fun to be had in the episode was Sylar taking down Nathan's goons.  Someone wake me up if/when this series gets better or is cancelled.

Kthxbi.

Sigh, going to have to wait until tomorrow to watch BBT/HIMYM/House.  Damn you, DVR only being able to record two things at once!

Blair

When did Blair Waldorf become such a f***ing idiot?

Seriously, I think that the first 55 minutes of this episode were some of the worst episode the has done since the not-yet-addictive early days (IMHO, everything pre-"Hi, Society").  The characters are doing things that make no sense, even in heightened, campy, teen soap world.

And the Chuck story?  WTF?  I guess it's setting up a new long-arc storyline/mystery about Bart, but boy was that clumsy.

Meanwhile... finally, Dan and Serena are DUNZO.  God, I hate Lonely Boy.  He's such a dick.  But I'm suddenly giving a crap about Rachel Carr...

But, seriously, after all her dealings with the Chuck Basses of the world, Blair let herself get (almost) taken down by this young, wide-eyed ingenue teacher?  Really?  REALLY?

Post-Game

Post game running time: 27 minutes.  By my account, the game ended at (putting this all in Eastern time) 10:13pm, when the telecast cut to commercial after the game ended and the celebration began.  The Office began at 10:40pm.  NBC, you were cutting it cloooose.  Did we learn nothing from ABC's 2002 Alias fiasco?

Show itself...

The opening is hilarious.  Classic Dwight.  And the opening credits have EVERYONE IN THEM!  Nice!

Alba/Black/Leachman cameo... eh/ew (though nice shout-out to not illegally downloading content yay).

Second half (the revelation that Michael was what was stressing everyone out and the roast) were less yay.

Amy Poehler sitcom promo!  Wait, it's called Parks and Recreation?  I thought it was called Public Service.  Meh on the official title...

Jim/Pam was cute (for, like, the first time this season).

I miss Holly.

Overall... easy to get into for nonfans?  Yeah (you just have to accept les shenanigans and go with the characters' quirks).  Doesn't necessitate tuning in again, though, and it wasn't LMFAO enough to convince nonfans that they ought to watch the series regularly.  We'll see what, if any, effect this has on the ratings on Thursday (is this the week it beats Grey's Anatomy and CSI in the demo?)

Without knowing the future effect on The Office's ratings, I still feel like NBC screwed up by not giving Chuck the post-game slot (would certainly say "look, we have confidence in this series!") and capitalizing on the 3D episode (which potentially could have continued into tomorrow's 8pm episode... thus dragging viewers in and giving the show a much-needed, much-deserved ratings bump as the sophomore series resumes its run).

Game Day

So, wow, that was some football game, wasn't it?

Ads... not a lot of awesome (certainly not in comparison to the football on display).  In fact, I think the only one that I genuinely loved was the Hulu spot.  I enjoyed the Coca-Cola ad where people drinking Coke became CGI characters, too, but didn't love it.

Okay, also the Transformers 2 spot was effective because, while I truly had no intention of seeing this sequel, the prospect of seeing Shia LaBeouf get the crap kicked out of him is too much to pass up.  They had to write (Write?  In this movie?  Really?) the actor's hand injury into the, um, plot of the movie (or somewhere between car chases, crashes, explosions, and CGI machinery).  You know me.  I have to say the word schadenfreude at least once per day just so I can prove I know how to pronounce it.  Also I remembered they filmed part of the movie at my alma mater (even if it's substituting not as my alma mater, but as the college in my hometown).  So, yeah.

But, overall, the ads both sucked and blew.  I have the 3D glasses for tomorrow night's Chuck, but the Monsters vs. Aliens trailer and the SoBe spot left much to be desired (the latter, I'll admit, I wasn't a big fan of the dancing lizards last year either, so this wasn't a surprise).

Of the NBC show spots, the Heroes-play-football thing was the best of the Monday bunch (and, man, they sure pushed the f*** outta Mondays), but the (mid-halftime) Thursday night "LMAO" ad was better.  I was surprised NBC gambled so much on the Monday promos.  Nothing for Biggest Loser (hello, post-Super Bowl weight loss inspiration?)  Nothing for Friday Night Lights (okay, THAT was no surprise).  Nothing for Knight Rider (lolololol).  Actually, okay, I was merely surprised there were so few "watch The Office tonight after the game" (there were only 2 or 3 that I can remember) or "watch NBC Thursday comedies" spots.

And apparently that annoying Pepsuber thing from last night's SNL was actually an ad for Pepsi.  Interesting.  Definitely got me to watch last night instead of skipping through the ads like I usually do.

SNL

Dude, Will Tippin is hosting SNL next weekend.

Ugh, can't believe they did Laser Cats 4 tonight.  I hate the Laser Cats digital shorts.  The female cast members proclaiming their love for Steve Martin through love standards was funny, and I enjoyed the opening Obama sketch.  Richard Dean Anderson cameo in the MacGruber set from tonight was fun... in the first part.  But the whole Pepsi-sponsored-MacGruber thing was lame (even more than MacGruber usually is).  Abbie Elliot as Angelina Jolie during Weekend Update was amusing... I miss the repartee Seth and Amy had, but yay featured player doing an impression for a character that could continue (where is Casey Wilson's Rachael Ray and Michaela Watkins' Arianna Huffington?)